Thursday, January 5, 2017

Next Steps

Yesterday I found out that I didn't get the job I really wanted.  I actually cried when I found out.  Blame it on menopause; blame it on frustration; blame it on depression... Blame it on the lack of communication on why I didn't get it.  All I know is I felt really down all day.  I struggled through work, even when my husband sent me funny texts.  When I looked at myself in the mirror, I kept thinking there was something wrong with me.  Did I offend someone in the eight hours of interviews?  Did I ask for too much money?  Did I laugh, when I should have kept it in?  What did I do wrong?

I am working currently at a position that is helping hold down the fort, but it isn't my forever home.  It's a place to go every morning, but there are things I don't like about it.

I can count on two fingers how many people I talk to from my last job.  I thought I had good relationships with my colleagues, and truly thought we were friends.  But I've become a pro at relationships ending when moving from job to job.   From 2006 - 2010 I worked a job where I made many friends.  After I left there, 75% of those friendships stayed in tact.  That job is where I learned to juggle multiple priorities, deal with multiple personalities, and traveled to some great cities in the US, Canada and Mexico.  I'll be honest, I loved that job.  I hated my boss; and my bosses boss, only one of which is still there today.  After that job, I had a job where I thought I could make a difference, but my vision was stifled and I found myself looking again.

I landed at a very cool experiential marketing company, where I rekindled high school friendships and met some great people.  In my mind, I felt like I was a dinosaur among all the 20-something, fresh out of college newbies.  They loved the work hard, play harder, mentality.  Drinking on the job was the norm.  I guess that just wasn't me.  I worked for a very tough client, and the job challenged me in ways I didn't think possible...but I missed my old life.  I missed marketing.

Maybe it's the career path I've chosen and the uncertainty in the market as to why I haven't had a 20-year career at a single company.  As I've moved from company to company, I fell in love with writing, social media and photography.  What I have seen in my 20++++ years of working, the jobs I want to do are often taken up by those 20-something, fresh out-of-college newbies.  Sadly, they don't pay what I'm worth.  How can I say that?  I know I'm good at what I do.

So, leading into 2017, here's my wish list of things I want to accomplish:

Rewrite my resume.  Again. And again.  Find that the place that fits me best, not me fitting there.  When I interview, change it around and find out why the company should be right for me, not why I should be right for the company.

Write every day.  Blogs; posts; journal entries; my second crack at a book.  Anything to keep my mind occupied.

Take pictures and book shoots.  Sports, senior, families, wedding, babies, nature.  You name it.

Refresh on Adobe applications.  Actually take time to sit down and learn new tips in the programs.

Keep up on social.  Yes, you'll see more random crap, but I also want to make people think.  I love it when I post something and people laugh, or they comment, and even when they debate.  

Get more followers on all my pages, but don't become white noise.  Get a following.  Easier said than done.

Now that I've had time to think about that great job I wanted so badly, I can honestly say fuck 'em.  They lost out on someone who would have rocked that job.  Here's to hitting the ground running 2017.  This year your gonna be my bitch.