Monday, December 14, 2015

40+10 Lessons Learned

It goes without saying that I read alot.  Books, magazines, blogs.  The back of shampoo bottles, toothpaste tubes and gel containers (don't judge...I know you do it too).

I read this blog tonight ( and quite a bit hit home.  Here are some of my favorites:

3. Always check for toilet paper before sitting down.  Your probably ok if you are in your own bathroom at home, within reaching distance of your cabinet or screaming distance of your kids, but do this at work or in a movie theatre, you'll be praying to God you have either your purse with you, or you can somehow make it from stall to stall without anyone seeing you.

6. A girl will never stop expecting other people to make a big deal about her birthday - even if she's 41 (45!).  I don't necessarily agree with this.  While I do think it really important that my husband, kids and mom remember, I don't care if my coworkers know what's going on.  I do, however, like when my Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and LinkedIn wishes surpass 100.  I don't claim to understand why.

9.  Ice cream is not better than love, and chocolate isn't better than sex.  Truth.

11.  Don't sneeze when you're eating crackers.  Unless you across from someone you really don't like. Then that shit is EPIC.

22.  Always wear underwear under white shorts.  And a bra under a tank top.  Unless you have the chest of a 12 year old boy, then go for it.

39.  Women can have rectal exams too.  Wait, what?  I'll pass.

40.  I still have alot to learn!  This goes without saying.

What else have I learned in my 45 years?  Just a few others that top my list:

1.  Life is too short to work for someone you don't trust.  You spend one fourth of your life working.  If you can't trust your boss, move on.

2.  Your kids grow up way too fast although right under your nose.  Before you know it, they'll be graduating college and planning their own futures.

3.  Don't feel like you need to please everyone in your extended family during the holiday season.  We have chosen to change how we celebrate because sometimes it needs to be just about us, and not about everyone else.  If that isn't your cup of tea, so be it.  Do what's right for you.

4. Don't be ashamed if you want to go back to coloring, but avoid the 'adult coloring book' fad.  It's totally ok to grab a Winnie the Pooh or Scooby Doo coloring book.

5.  Rethink who you've given access to your life.  If you don't interact, maybe it's time to delete.

6.  You'll never get a second chance to say goodbye.  

7.  It's ok if swear a little too much.  Unless you are in church or your child's grade school, there is still free speech...and sometimes you just need to use the word fuck.

8.  Worry about who is in your house, and what you have, and not what everyone else is doing or has.  You don't know their circumstances, nor do they know yours.  Unless they are the type of person to post every beef they have with every person on their friends list, what their salary is, or how they've been shamed, it's none of your business.  

9.  Sometimes it's ok to pop a bag of popcorn, pull up a chair and watch the insults fly (see above).

10. Don't feel bad for laughing at number 9 above.

Bonus.  Live every moment. Laugh every day.  Love beyond words.

All-in-all, I would rather be 45 with kids nearly out of the house, than 25 and starting out over again.  Do I know what this list will look like at 65?  Not a clue.  I guess we'll just have to wait and find out.

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